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Writer's pictureAmanda Hartwig

How Do People Do It Without Jesus?


While we have endured this heartache, 

We have clenched to the love of God. 

And while we have endured these trenches, 

We have felt the temptation to give up. 

Give up on the life. 

Give up on our marriage. 

Give up on the idea of any positive coming out of Bo’s death. 

But then we found Jesus. 

How “religious” does that sound? 

Well.

We found Jesus through prayer. 

But before Bo passed,

I didn’t even know how to pray. 

It was only by him passing,

That I was open to the experience of Jesus having anything to do with healing my broken heart. 

And then it happened. 

I prayed. 

I quieted my mind,

And spoke out to Him. 

After I did- 

I felt this love grow. 

I don’t take communion. 

Not often, anyway. 

This is because loving Jesus doesn’t involve gifts or repetitious words. 

He’s not on a cross in the front of the church. 

He’s our God. 

He lives. 

Jesus lives. 

He isn’t dead. 

He lives in you. 

He lives in me. 

He’s calling out. 

But He’s a gentleman. 

He’s knocking at the door. 

But He won’t barge in. 

But still, everyday we encounter non believers. 

And that’s okay! 

Unbelievers are everywhere. 

But when you walk through a death of this magnitude-

Where it crushes your soul,

And deeply wounds your spirit-

How do you do it without Jesus? 

Do you believe that your child is with God? 

I’ve had parents say that their child is in a hole in the ground. 

That’s it. Nothing more. Nothing less. 

This couldn’t be further from the truth. 

We are empty vessels when we die. 

We return to the ground because that’s how we were created. 

From the ground. 

But our souls are gone. 

Released into the spirit immediate. 

To the mother who bears witness to holding her lifeless child, you’re not alone. 

To the father who cries out and feels helpless for his wife and her pain. Holding up the rest of his family. 

We see you. 

Jesus sees you! 

It sounds crazy. 

But it just might be crazy enough to work. 

What have you got to lose? 

You have so much more to gain. 


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